Reader Question:

I came across some guy online which life 500 miles away. He’s 34 and I also’m 53. The guy performed let me know he previously a woman he dated “locally” hence he had been merely on the website interested in buddies. 3 months later on we realized we’ve got feelings per other.

Meanwhile, the guy however shows he is having issues together with girlfriend, who is not some body he’s “dating” in your area. He is living with the lady and so they’ve been collectively for four years.

I finally determined we’d to meet to see if this was really worth following. He gave me why he don’t consider it had been right to exercise as he was still together. I finally provided him an ultimatum and informed him I couldn’t play second fiddle. He professed his really love but stated he was very confused.

Do I provide him ultimatum, it really is the lady or me personally? In the morning we wrong to ask him to produce that decision?

-Nancy (Fl)

Dr Wendy Walsh’s Answer:

Oh Nancy, Nancy, Nancy! You penned to me for sincerity, right? Well, have you been sitting down? Because here arrives a honey pot of reality.

You are surviving in fantasy secure, my precious girl. You’ve not also came across this person which might not end gay hook up Tampa being a person and exactly who may or may not have a girlfriend.

I very recommend you see the documentary “Catfish” (available on iTunes and Netflix) about an internet love fraud.

But even if you never do this, let’s assume for a moment he is really exactly who he states he is and disregard the reality he began creating to you by lying about their connection condition.

Why don’t we simply go through the alleged facts.

A.) He’s almost twenty years more youthful than you.

B.) He is in a serious relationship.

C.) He told you right away he’s only trying to end up being pals.

Therefore I ask you to answer, the reason why do you really exposure your own cardiovascular system on these a poor choice?

The question shouldn’t be about giving him an ultimatum, but instead, in the event you give yourself the love you deserve?

If so, next this isn’t the pony you really need to drive in to the sundown with. Operate, woman!

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